Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Consequences

This evening I sewed a cord cover for a lamp hanging in my family room. I put my sewing needle in a drawer of the tv armoir where I've been keeping my sewing stuff (I was hiding the quilt the girls and I made for Phillip there). This is the same drawer we keep our wii games and remotes. The spirit told me not to put it there since that drawer gets used so much, but I ignored the prompting since I was in a hurry. An hour later Alexa was getting ready to play the wii, the needle fell out, and she stepped on it. It broke in her foot and she spent a painful hour and a half at the doctor's office while he dug the broken piece out. What a way for me to learn a lesson! Why couldn't it be me who stepped on it?! Better yet, why didn't I listen to the prompting of the Holy Ghost. Ugh.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Cheerios

I'm letting Sophie pick Cheerios off the floor and eat them while I work on Christmas gifts, and she is very happy. Does that make me a bad mom, or a mom with wisdom under her belt?

Which child...?

My grandma cut this article out of the newspaper and gave it to me today.

http://www.deseretnews.com/article/705394839/Which-child-has-the-disability.html
(Be sure to read both pages)

I read it and felt a wave of many different emotions in a very short period of time.
I felt angry, appalled, reminiscent, sad, and then grateful.
I will never forget the day, just before Christmas in 2004, when Phillip and I sat in the doctor's office and we were told our precious little girl would be born with
Spina Bifida.
 As if that isn't enough to bear, I will never forget the moments following when the genetic counselor asked if we wanted to continue with the pregnancy.
WHAT?!
Of course we would!
And we would give birth to our child and love her with everything we have, treat her with all the kindness and love that we treated our other daughter, and give her the best life possible.

It saddens me, and frightens me, that a woman can take a "simple blood test" and decide that her unborn child isn't perfect enough for her, then end that child's life before it even began! I appreciate the question this article poses...
"What is the definition of a disabled child?...The one who cannot love or the one who cannot perform calculus?"

I am grateful every day for my "disabled" child.
So what if she doesn't read as well as the school says she should?
So what if it takes her longer to do her schoolwork?
So what if she has to turn her head in strange positions to see clearly?
So what if she gets a little emotional at recess because she didn't have a chance to tell her sister that she loves her?

 Her capacity to love and forgive is far greater than I could ever hope to have. Thank you, Grace, for teaching me the important things in life.

I love you, my special child

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Forever and Ever

Adelle: "Mommy, I love you. I will love you forever and ever, all my life."

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Math

Grace: "9+9?! Are you kidding me?! I only have 10 fingers!"
Alexa: "Grace, it's ok. You can use mine."

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Bedtime Stories

This is the book Adelle has been taking to bed with her the past few nights. How many three year olds choose that for their bedtime story?! This is the same three year old who told her Grandma that Daddy was Santa Claus! Oh how I love this spunky little girl!

Friday, December 2, 2011

I'm a Grandma!

Adelle "gave birth" to two babies a couple nights ago. They looked remarkably like my heating pads. She had a boy named Cutie and a girl named Rainbow. As if that isn't sweet enough, she laid each of them on her chest after they "came out" and patted their little backs. What a little angel!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Coming Soon...

Grace recently completed her second three-week session of physical therapy at Now I Can and it was awesome! I will post pictures and her new video in the next few days.

In the meantime...Granger High school is doing a
benefit concert for Grace
 on Wednesday, October 12th, at 7:00 pm. Their Dance Company, Show Choir, and Drill Team will all be performing, as well as the Dance Companies from Hunter and Cypress High Schools. Grace will be performing in the final number of the evening with the Dance Company! Super cute!! She will also be presented with a special needs tricycle so she can FINALLY ride a bike. Hooray! Tickets are $5 each and can be purchased at the door. It's going to be a fun, fun night!!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

fun, fun, FUN!! (and for a good cause!)

grace will soon be starting her next round of intensive physical therapy at Now I Can. Hooray!

so, on saturday, august 27th we are holding a yard sale/bake sale to raise funds for her therapy. there is also an online auction we've put together with tons of fun, fun things to bid on.

thank you thank you thank you to all you generous angels who have donated your time and talents!!

Click HERE to go to our auction and look around! You'll be glad you did!
And click on THIS to see her video from her last session. It's AMAZING!

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Here fishy, fishy, fishy!

We had such a great time fishing in Tibble Fork Reservoir with my parents. Unfortunately, the fish weren't biting much, but we made some good memories!
 

Dad used to take me fishing all the time when I was a girl...
And now he's fishing with my little girl!

Sophie LOVED having Grace play with her!



Baptism Day

My sweet, sweet baby girl was baptized on August 6th and it was an absolutely
 beautiful day!

Building up to her baptism I was feeling a little sad because I felt like her baptism was the next big step to her growing up and moving away, but her enthusiasm become contagious! She was literally counting down the hours until her baptism and had a permanent smile on her face the entire day. I was so proud of her!




 My mom made Alexa's dress she wore for her confirmation, and her baptism dress was the dress my mom made for me when I was baptized. It was so special! I will never forget the look on her face when I met her in the dressing room when she first came out of the water. 

"I made 10 goals!"

 A wonderful young scout in Provo put together a soccer camp for children with special needs with Now I Can. My girls were SO excited to play soccer and had the best time!! They even received little trophies!








Sunday, August 14, 2011

COMPUTER DOWN!!

Oh my goodness, has it really been four months since my last post?! Aargh! My computer has been dying a slow painful death and it's time to put it out of it's misery. Until then, my blog is on hold. :0(  There's so much to say when I'm back up! Birthdays! Fishing! Baptisms! Fun!!! So don't forget about me!! ;0)

Friday, April 22, 2011

I'm just going to say it

So, most of my blog posts are pretty generic and unemotional. Just trying to document what our little family is doing.
But today...
I need an outlet.
And today I'm going to admit, out loud, which I never ever do, that sometimes...
it's
just
not
fair
I never ever EVER want anyone to feel sorry for me so it's easy to put on a happy face, but sometimes I just don't want to.
Everyday I watch my sweet little girl crawl around on the floor. Five-year old girls don't crawl on the floor.
Everyday I see her struggle to crawl up the stairs.
Everyday I see her wait patiently at the kitchen table waiting for us to get her down while the other girls have long gone.
Everyday I send her to school wondering if she's going to have fun at recess.
Everyday I send her to school and wonder if she's going to have an accident in her diaper (yes, no bowel control quite frankly sucks)
Everyday I wonder if the kids at school are going to see her diaper hidden under the panties I put on her.
Everyday I wonder if the pain in her head is from a normal headache, or if her shunt is failing. 
Everyday I wonder if I'm a bad mom for getting impatient with her mental/emotional needs.
Everyday my heart breaks a little when she says, "someday, when I'm like Alexa, I'm going to run a race!"
Everyday I strategize how I am going to go shopping with all four girls, because I can't push a shopping cart and wheelchair at the same time.
Everyday I wonder if I give my 7-year old too much responsibility because she helps me push the shopping cart and wheelchair at the same time.
Everyday I look outside and think, "wish I could walk the girls home from school today, but I can't push a stroller, a wheelchair, and carry a walker at the same time."
Everyday I wish with all my heart and soul that she could run around and play with the other kids.
Everday I take pride in the way her sisters crawl on the floor with her when they race, or let her win when she's walking.
Everyday I am thankful for the sweet hugs and kisses she gives me.
Everyday I thank Heavenly Father for trusting me with such a special little angel.
Everyday I am thankful for a loving and sweet husband who never, ever begrudges the struggles we face with this special gift.
Everyday I am thankful for a wise husband who let me see that God has a plan and will still love me even when I feel so angry that my daughter isn't healed. When I can't read the scripture stories about
the lame man who could walk
and the blind man who could see.
Or when I feel bad that no matter how much faith I have that she will be healed that it just won't matter.
Everyday I am thankful for my savior and for the atonement, because
Everyday
my
heart
hurts

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Anyone Feel Like a Run?

Most of you know that Grace participated an intensive physical therapy program through a non-profit organization called Now I Can. She had therapy four hours a day, five days a week, for three weeks in Provo. Wow! Her session was an extremely exhausting and emotional experience for her (and us!) and she developed life-changing skills that have helped her in ways that no other therapy could. Before therapy Grace couldn't take more than three steps in her crutches, and now she walks the hallways at church. Before therapy we believed that the best ambulation she would have would be in crutches, but now we have hope that someday Grace will walk COMPLETELY independently! What we have received from our experience at Now I Can is priceless, and we look forward to her next three-week session in August.

On May 14th Now I Can is hosting its annual Run to Walk in Provo. It's a 5k/1 mile walk or run, and we want to invite you all to join us! Obviously, we will love you whether you participate or not, but we would like to give everyone an opportunity to participate in such a neat event. (We recently participated in the Hydrocephalus Association's annual walk and kept it a secret, then had people say, "why didn't you tell us!?" So, now we're telling EVERYONE!)

Please feel free to forward this information to anyone you think might be interested. This is our first time and we are super excited! Also, please let me know if you decide to register so that I can let Now I Can know who we have recruited (we get $ off her session for each person we recruite).


I've been a super-slacker in getting this info out and the walk prices increase on Friday. Oopsie! So, if you decide you want to do this please register TODAY! (Or tomorrow, I guess. haha!) Complete info on the race is at http://www.runtowalk.com/.


Thank you all for your constant loving support of Grace and her efforts.

PS...Again, please don't feel any obligation...we know its an early morning and not close to home. We will be walking in the Hydrocephalus Walk in August so there will be another opportunity to walk for Grace if you want to! :0)

Here is the link to Grace's video of her last session at Now I Can. Grab your tissue and enjoy! 

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Suz's giveaway

Hey girls! My sis, Suzanne, is doing a fun giveaway on her blog. A Victoria's Secret gift card!! Check her out at:

Sunday, March 20, 2011

First Birth

Wow, birth is beautiful! A couple weeks ago I had the priviledge of attending a client's birth as her doula. It was an amazing and beautiful experience and I feel so honored to be a part of it! Yay!

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Scandalous?

First of all, I know I'm being irreverent by adding this post right now, but I just have too! I'm sitting in the mother's lounge at church feeding my sweet little Sophie baby and I'm thinking, "why do I have to be in here?" What is so wrong with a mother nursing her baby in sacrament? Maybe my feelings on public breastfeeding are a little liberal for our society, but I have no problem with it as long as the mother covers herself. I feel like I would be breaking the tradition of Mormon culture if I dared to nurse my baby in sacrament meeting! Scandalous! So instead I sit in a cold, stinky room feedng my darling and missing the most important part of the week, taking the sacrament. I have dared to nurse her in the foyer when the smell of poopy diapers rotting in a diaper pail all day has been too strong, and I could see the discomfort on the faces of those walking past me. Normally I could care less about people's "comfort" when I nurse my baby in public, but this is church so I guess I could care a little.

PS...(update) I finally did it! I nursed Sophie baby in sacrament a couple weeks ago and it was so liberating! The funny part is that Phillip, who was sitting right next to me, didn't even know for about five minutes. :0)

Saturday, February 5, 2011

I did it!!

Six years ago I was due with my second baby, and I knew I wasn't going to be allowed to hold her after she was born. I knew I was going to deliver my baby in a specially designated room for high-risk babies, and that the moment my little angel came into the world she would be whisked away from me and passed through a window into a special little nursery. I knew that I wouldn't be able to hold her for hours and hours, and this was a very difficult reality for me. So I made a decision.

 I knew that I needed some control over this less than desirable situation, so I made a firm decision to deliver this baby girl in the most natural and beautiful way I could imagine...completely unmedicated. I recognized that this was going to be more than difficult, so I hired a doula to support Phillip and me during the labor. She was phenomenal and was a tremendous asset to me in being able to birth Grace in the best way possible, considering the circumstances. When Grace was born I was completely overjoyed and elated, and had never felt so powerful and beautiful in my entire life. Remembering the strength and love I developed during those hours of laboring with her was one of the only things that got me through those next tough days when I had to watch my precious little baby travel to hell and back. 

My doulas and Phillip helping me stay focused during some intense back labor

This was my first glimpse of my new baby. (Notice my beat-up face? I did a header off a porch the week before!)

Five years later I was due to give birth to my fourth daughter and again decided that I wanted to give birth to her my way. And that meant no medication. So I decided to hire a doula again. This time I hired my dear friend and boss, Rebecca Overson. She was amazing! 
Me and Rebecca after Sophie was born
Nearly six years ago I decided that I wanted to someday become a labor doula and give women that same power. I LOVE BIRTH! I love pregnancy, I love labor, and I love birth! I believe that a woman's body is made to give birth. I believe we are meant to do it in the most natural way that her health will allow. (I say this because I think home births are amazing and wonderful and I would have loved to have experienced one, but I have a heart condition which prevented that for me) I strongly believe in unmedicated deliveries with as little medical intervention as possible and a doula can be an integral part of making that happen for a woman. I also believe that every woman needs to make her own, educated decision on the type of labor she wants, and if she chooses to have an epidural then that's ok too. (I did it for two of my deliveries!)

So, nearly six years after making the decision, I have finally done it! This weekend I took an extensive training course and I can now cross "become a labor doula" off my to-do list. I am so excited!!

Friday, January 28, 2011

Need a contractor

Phillip and I are looking for estimates on a major bathroom remodel. Anybody know of a trustworthy contractor who may want to tackle the job? We're getting estimates from people I found online, but it would be so much better to have a reference.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Sweet, sweet girls

We just had these pictures taken of the girls and I had to share!